Like most people in this situation, you are coping with the shock of loss and figuring out what you can do to make them understand what a error they have made. Nothing can quite prepare you for that gut wrenching moment that your lover tells you they want to finish the relationsip.Even though you are feeling anxious and miserable, try to refrain from contacting your lost love asking questions about the break up - they need some space right now. It is the period just after you have broken up that is the most crucial. Saying and doing the right things at this time are vital factors in your relationship with your ex. First off, the very best thing you can do is to agree with your ex that breaking up is a good idea. I know it sounds a strange way to react, but it will take your ex by surprise as they will not be expecting this type of reaction from you. By responding in this way, you are using the most successful technique that is known to ensure that the lines of communication with your lost love are kept open. If you have already been constantly contacting your ex in one way or another then there is another approach you can try to diffuse the situation. It's a bit harder to take this action, but you need to do it to give your ex the space that they asked for. So, what do you do? You write them a brief letter, in which you just say that they were right about the break up and you agree with them. It will cause your ex to think twice and see you as being potentially unavailable to them, which makes you more alluring to them. Make sure the letter is very short and the only thing you say is that they made the right choice in breaking up. But it must be a letter, not a phone call or a text message. Why is this method so powerful? At last you are telling them you have listened to them. And you are agreeing with them, making them right. The kicker is that you are actually doing it in writing. Simply sending yet another text message, or leaving a message on their machine for the umpteenth time is not going to have the same effect as sending them a real, tangible letter that they can hold and pore over and keep.

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